Writing Ambiguously for Smarties

Careful writers always take into consideration those essential elements that when ignored lead to poor writing. The components of poor writing could include:

• Weak vocabulary


• Poor punctuation


• Long sentences


• Ineffectual grammar, syntax, or structure


• Unrelated clauses


• Overemphasizing to accentuate

When any of these weaknesses strike either alone or in combination with others, poor writing often occurs. However, there are certain times when these weaknesses can be valuable in writing. Perhaps the writer is choosing to write ambiguously. As a technical writer, I too find it shocking that someone would choose to write in a way that leaves the reader with an unclear message, but consider this:

You and your obnoxious neighbor have arrived home from work at exactly the same time and you notice that he is making his way toward your car. “Here we go!” you grumble to yourself. “What did I do (or not do) now?” You inspect your lawn to make certain your tree limbs aren’t blowing in the direction of his house. You remember measuring the grass “to the millimeter” when you last cut it (at his request) to ensure it matched the level of his. What could he possibly complain about now?

As you sit lower in your seat, praying for the power of invisibility, he knocks on your car window. The smile on his face is unusual (and actually looks painful), but you quickly learn his motive. He begins to tell you about his strong desire to becoming the President of your home owner’s association and he would like for you to write a letter of recommendation for him. “Ha! Are you kidding?!” you almost shout out loud. But in the spirit of neighborliness (or perhaps to get away quickly) you tell him you will.

Now what? You know that he will have an opportunity to read what you have written, but you can’t imagine setting your neighborhood up for failure. What do you do?

The answer—you write ambiguously. You disorganize the syntax or structure of the sentence. You punctuate unclearly. You leave your readers (decision makers) with a choice about how they want to view your message.

Here is an example:

Dear Board:

You won’t find many people like Mr. XYZ. (Thank God). I, myself, find that he is always trying. (read: annoying) In fact, I must say that one usually comes away from him with a good feeling. His fellow neighbors and I often discuss how he takes a great deal of enjoyment out of living within our community. (He takes it away from others as well.) And, there is no questioning his dedication to the beautification of his home. (If you do question it, he will go ballistic.)

Here in the community, his input is always critical. (He never says anything nice), and I must say that he stands alone in his ability to get along with others. (No one will stand near him.) It is hard to imagine that anyone could fail to be impressed by or like Mr. XYZ. (He will make an impression, but no one will like him.)
I sincerely hope that you will consider my recommendation of Mr. XYZ when selecting our new association President.

Thank you,
Fellow Homeowner

For more information and recommendation ideas about using ambiguous writing effectively, you can read The Lexicon of Intentionally Ambiguous Recommendations by Robert J. Thornton. Ideas for this post were selected from the reading of this truly enjoyable book.

Spell Checkers are Grate!

Here is a poem that I believe illustrates Yana's point in the following post. I am borrowing it from The Complete Idiot's Guide to Grammar and Style.

Who wood have guest
The Spell Chequer would super seed
The assent of the editor
Who was once a mane figure?
Once, awl sought his council;
Now nun prophet from him.
How suite the job was;
It was all sew fine...
Never once was he board
As he edited each claws,
Going strait to his deer work
Where he'd in cyst on clarity.
Now he's holy unacceptable,
Useless and know kneaded...
This is kow miner issue,
For he cannot urn a wage.
Two this he takes a fence,
Butt nose naught watt too due.
He's wade each option
Of jobs he mite dew,
But nothing peaks his interest
Like making pros clear.
Sum will see him silly
For being sew upset,
But doesnt' good righting
Go beyond the write spelling?

Sometimes a spell check is not enough

I am an editor. I read a lot. And I often find mistakes in the things I read, from books to newspaper articles to cereal boxes. I know that grammatical and punctuation errors are a fact of life. Not everyone was an English major in college, blah, blah.

But some errors are just so easily preventable. Here's a little tip for all writers, editors, and publishers out there: running spell check is not enough. You actually have to read stuff before you put it in print!

Here's a recent error I found in the novel "You Suck: A Love Story" by Christopher Moore. And I quote:

"Jeez," Drew said, then realizing that he had said it allowed, he cleared his throat and said, "I'll be right there." p. 223

On a similar note, here's an excerpt from a recent article in the New York Times:

Is It Ripe, or Rife?
By Philip B. Corbett

Even in the rush to publish, writers and editors at The Times strive for polish and precision in our prose. Sometimes we succeed.

But sometimes, after the dust settles, we are dismayed to see painful grammatical errors, shopworn phrasing or embarrassing faults in usage. A quick fix might be possible online; otherwise, the lapses become lessons for next time.

These comments are adapted from After Deadline, a weekly newsroom critique overseen by Philip B. Corbett, the deputy news editor who is also in charge of The Times’s style manual. The goal is not to chastise, but to point out recurring problems and suggest solutions.

Since most writers encounter similar troubles, we think these observations might interest general readers, too.

Words to Watch: Ripe or Rife?
These similar-sounding words are easily confused. “Rife” means (among other things) “full of, abounding in,” and is used with “with.” “Ripe” does not normally have that sense — it means, essentially, “fully developed, mature.”

The uncertainty is understandable, especially since metaphorically “ripe” may carry an overtone of “fullness.” Often we end up saying “ripe with” when we mean “rife with.”

A couple of recent cases where we went astray:
•••
Responding to an episode ripe with the potential to stoke unrest, the commander, Maj. Gen. Jeffery Hammond, held a meeting Saturday with Iraqi leaders.
•••
The blogosphere is ripe with tales of people who mail in their house keys to their banks rather than hold on to their depreciating homes, but there is not a lot of evidence that it is actually happening very often.

More Words to Watch
A colleague on the sports desk offered a few other pairs of words that we’ve occasionally mixed up. Beware:

1. loathe is a verb meaning to hate; loath is an adjective meaning unwilling or reluctant.

2. peddle means to sell; pedal is what you do to a bicycle.

3. chord in music and mathematics; cord for the spinal or vocal kind.

4. discreet means prudent, circumspect or modest; discrete means separate or individually distinct.

5. forward indicates a direction; foreword is the introductory note in a book.

Intellectual Property and Blogging

I blog because it’s enjoyable. I blog because I want to write something every day. I blog because I want to let others know that I am here. Do I feel the need to protect those things I write? Not often. But sometimes I think about the stories, poems, and other “intellectual property” that I put out there. Is it protected simply because I posted it?

What is intellectual property in the electronic age? What happens when we make our work available on the World Wide Web through blogs and such? Several treaties have been passed to address the problem of vast opportunities for worldwide distribution of copyrighted materials and to protect those writers and artists from theft of their electronic material. However, chat rooms, discussion boards, e-mails, web sites, blogs, and even home pages also make it possible to publish thoughts, ideas, and works that upon “publication” are immediately available for anyone and everyone to access and read. They become public property and can easily be used without permission or commission. The WWW makes it simple and cheap to deliver cost-free copying of information.

With this change in technology, can intellectual property remain protected? According to the World Intellectual Property Organization (WIPO), “intellectual property refers to creations of the mind: inventions, literary and artistic works, and symbols, names, images, and designs used in commerce.” Using some else’s intellectual property, words, or forms of expression in a work and failing to cite the source of a direct quote or failing to give credit for a paraphrased idea is a serious offense. In the past, intellectual property was just that—property. It was considered to have monetary value. To publish another’s work without that person’s permission would be a crime equivalent to stealing capital.

Does the capability of the Internet to provide free copying of content change the role of intellectual property? Do writers lose their desire to put out their best stuff as a result of mass copying? What can free writers and such do to protect themselves as well as their intellectual possessions?

On being a working writer

When I was in college, I wrote a lot of papers. Some were academic; some were creative. The process usually went something like this:
1. Get assignment.
2. Complain.
3. Do nothing for the duration of time allotted for assignment.
4. Do minimal research at the last minute.
5. Write paper at 2 am while my cat slept on the desk near me.
6. Turn it in.
7. Receive an A. Most of the time...

Now, I have a real job that involves writing and editing. I am expected to produce copy, often under very tight deadlines. I no longer have the luxury of slacking off until the very last possible moment... Or do I?

I find that my writing process hasn't changed an awful lot over the years. When faced with a writing task at work, I will often let it marinate in my head for a day or two before I actually start writing. During that time, I'm not actively thinking about the task, but my mind is subconsciously formulating outlines, titles, sentences, and solutions to problems. If I sat down immediately to the task, I would most likely spend a day staring at a blank page and getting progressively more frustrated. The "marinating" process allows me to come to the task prepared to tackle the project. When I actually do open that Word document, I am ready to make magic. Isn't that what writing is, really?

I wonder how other working writers face these issues. Can anyone just write on command? I think that no matter what you're writing, there's some sort of creative aspect to it, whether it's in the document's organization, tone, graphic design, or audience. The working writer's job is to take all of that into account, be creative, and complete the project on time. A pretty tall order!